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For nine months, the mother and child have lived as one. The child feels the respiration of the mother, hears the mother’s voice and heartbeat.
At birth, the child is for the first time outside of the mother’s body but must not be taken away from the mother. This is the time of the External Pregnancy from birth to about 9 months. It is at nine months when the child crawls and at that moment moves away from the mother.
Joseph Chilton Pearce in his book “Biology of Transcendence” speaks of a new discovery of neurocardiology, a new branch of science. We have a fifth brain that is not in our head but in our heart. The HeartMath Institute found that the electromagnetic energy produced by the heart form a torus or field that extends as far as 12 to 15 feet from the body where it is generated. We all produce such an electromagnetic field, but during pregnancy the torus produced by the heart helps to establish a very special bond between the mother and fetus. Keeping newborns far from the mother, more than three feet, interrupts this special connection. That is why newborns separated from their mothers feel abandoned and alone and they cry. Because of the special attraction of the mother and the child, the child must not be separated from the mother physically or psychologically during the first six to eight weeks.
These first six to eight weeks of life are called the Symbiotic Life when the mother and child begin a life together. Just as the child is adjusting to this new environment so is the mother’s body returning to its pre pregnancy state.
There are three forms of contact with special significance to the mother / newborn relationship. They are:
1.Holding which should be done very near to the body
2.Handling when we dress, bath or change the newborn.
3.Feeding which create again the physical unity especially during breastfeeding.
Through these physical connections the mother and newborn interact and continue the development of their relationship. Basic trust in the environment is created when the contact is loving, secure and predictable. Everything that is done with the infant is education.
The moments when the infant is bathed, diapered, dressed or fed are opportunities to interact, smile, caress and communicate, which nurture the relationship to the adult and create a sense of wellbeing in the environment.
Here are some ideas for preparing for personal care of the infant:
1.Ready the materials needed. For diapering, have the diapers, the wipes right in the change area; for bathing, have the soap, wash cloth, towel, bathwater and clothing where the infant will be bathed. Having everything ready allows you to give your full attention to the infant.
2. Look at what the infant is doing. Just because you are ready to change the diaper does not necessarily mean that your infant is. If the baby is engaged in play, do not interrupt.
3.Tell your infant what you are about to do. As you continue to speak to your infant, he will begin to recognize your tone, body language and words.
4.Talk with your infant about everything you are doing. As you prepare the infant for bathing, tell them, “It is time for your bath so I am going to pick you up and we will go to the bathroom.” Pause so the infant can take in your words and then cooperate with your efforts.
The basic needs of the infant are direct contact with the mother, respect by the adults of their biological rhythms, predictable order in which things are done and the ability to explore the new environment with all her senses.
The rhythm of daily life needs to be orderly. When the infant opens his eyes, the items should be in the same place. Orientation makes it easy to live and know where you are. The child should always be fed and changed in the same place. They need to be given the opportunity to move without restriction. By placing a mat in a little corner with a mirror at the base, the child can move and look in the mirror. Very soon the child will recognize himself.
Infants nurtured in such an environment prepared for their development are happy, confident, curious and thriving.
NEXT: The four most common mistakes parents make
Judith Cunningham is the founder and executive director of the Montessori Model United Nations, has nearly 30 years of experience as a Montessori teacher and administrator in the U.S. and Canada and has traveled in Europe and Asia on behalf of the Montessori community. She holds an AMI Elementary (6-12) Diploma from Bergamo, Italy, in addition to a master’s in counseling psychology and graduate certification in dispute resolution. She heads Oak Farm Montessori School, Avilla. Contact:
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